Sometimes you move through life with a powerful tribe. Sometimes you quietly stand in the shadows of many. And sometimes you move from tribe to tribe, gathering what nurtures you most. Right now, I am somewhere in between tribes; lurking in the shadows of some and trying to shine the light on another.
It has been my experience that there are generally two varieties of women in this world: women who surround themselves with other women, women that form and join tribes and those that don’t (I call them the nomads). I am the former and have had the pleasure of being a member in many tribes of women. Some short lived, some long lasting, some by necessity and some going through more than one revival.
I am a woman of many tribes.
In high school, I was shunned for speaking my mind and within a day, another tribe of women took me in. In college I was ostracized while studying abroad (for reasons I still don’t know) and again, instantly another tribe took me in. Post college, I wandered around tribeless trying to figure out what the hell I was doing with my life. I bounced from bad relationship to bad relationship until I finally found yet another tribe.
The beautiful thing about finding your tribe is its plurality and its fluidity. It ebbs and flows. You never have to be part of just one tribe. Throughout your life you’ll have many tribes and they will fill what you need most in that moment.
This past spring I went to BSchool with Marie Forleo , in one of the online forums a woman posted :
I’m feeling so much love for all of you already! Having come from years of operating at a competitive level [deletion], it is a first for me to find women supporting each other!!! It is so different from what I had experienced in the past years, were the few women focused in professional [deletion] would never open a door for another woman! They could not see that there is a piece of the pie for everyone and that’s why I started to fade away from doing the [deletion] at that level! This community is a JOY! I am expanding into a sisterhood for the first time in my life! 🙂 Thanks for being here!
(deletions for anonymity)
The Forleo online tribe is one of my many tribes. It rocks more than I have words for. It’s the first business tribe I have been a part of that is competition free, to the core. Even my yoga tribe isn’t competition free. While I haven’t been active in the forums for a months, I know that if I were to post there, needing help, encouragement, my online tribe would have my back.
This summer I broke up with yoga (more on that later) and left my business. The two together have left me feeling as if I lost my yoga tribe. In reality, I know it’s not lost. It just needs cultivation. Sometimes it takes a while to get over a break up.
Do you come from one or many tribes?